Love Me
by Sophia.Love.Linstead
Summary: Jay punches Charlie for all the hurt he's caused Erin. Erin shows up at Jay's door unexpectedly that night asking for only one thing. Set in 1x15.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Chicago PD**

 **A/N: I have re watched season 1 of Chicago PD and I just can't stop with these stories. lol I don't know how I'm even finding time to watch. haha**

 **Sorry if this one is a little confusing, the start has some dialogue from the show but I've changed certain parts of the scenes to suit my story.**

Love Me

Jay POV

"Really, Detective? Would it be my business?" My eyes narrow at Charlie.

"Detective? What are you talking about, Charlie?" Mouse acts shocked, fear in his tone.

"Shut up, Mouse."

"We met at the station with Erin Lindsay, or did you forget?"

"No, I definitely wouldn't forget something like that. Is there anything you want to tell us, Charlie?" I take a threatening step towards him; remembering how Erin reacted as soon as she saw him that night.

Thinking back to how she's been acting today, I know in my gut this man is responsible and I want to take him down for whatever he's got her pulled into.

"Nope. I'm super cool, man. Tell Erin I said hey, though. Back in the day, she was, mm, something." The implication in his tone sends anger coursing through my body; I punch him hard in the face hearing something crack.

"You stay the hell away from her. You hear?" I growl at him, fire in my eyes.

He stands back upright and blood is pouring down his nose, I pin him against the wall before punching his stomach.

"Or I swear to god you'll wish you were never born." I threaten pulling my arm back to punch him again.

Adam and Mouse pull me off him harshly and drag me outside, as I continue to struggle against them.

"What the hell was that man?" Adam yells once we are on the street.

"He saw me with Lindsay." I shrug Adam off.

"Okay. But not what I was referring to."

"Oh man, I'm so screwed." Mouse complaints.

"Relax, man. I got you."

A million thoughts are running through my head, the most prominent being I need to speak with Erin to see how we'll hand this.

* * *

Erin POV

I'm making my way upstairs thinking back to my conversation with Jay, the way he didn't look at me differently when I confessed Charlie has something big over me.

He didn't hesitate in offering his help to fix my problems, all I wanted was to open up to him and tell him everything.

The only things stopping me; was the look in his eyes that I desperately don't want to change and bringing him into my mess of a life.

I reach my hand up and knock on Charlie's door, when he opens it I instantly feel disgust in my stomach and am counting down the seconds until I can leave.

"I met your Detective friend." I roll my eyes as I step through the door, turning back to Charlie.

"He had a look in his eye when I said your name. I seen that look in your boys' eyes before." Charlie's looking down at me, I instantly know he's speaking of Jay.

"Don't." I hold my hand up, refusing to allow Charlie to taint Jay for me.

"What happened to you?" I ask as I nod to his face.

"Oh, you don't know? Your little boyfriend roughed me up. Didn't like our past together I don't think." I blink confused at Charlie.

"You told him about us?" Shock in my tone and fear in my veins, my eyes still taking in Jay's handiwork.

"He got the hint." Charlie smirks down at me.

"Here's your blueprints." I push them into his hand before leaving him in the apartment.

"I need one more thing."

* * *

Jay POV

"How'd it go with Hank? Did you speak to him?" I approach Erin in the break room, referring back to our conversation in the roll up.

The look on her face and the fear in her eyes made me want to take her in my arms, instead I let her know I would handle the situation however she wanted.

She turned instead to Hank for help with whatever Charlie has hanging over her.

"Don't Jay." She holds her hand up, her eyes flickering down to my bruised hand.

"Don't what?" My eyebrows scrunched up.

"Just don't pretend to care. I'm over it." She turns away from me finishing her coffee.

"Excuse me? How can you say I don't care about you? I've made that obvious… even today I came to you and told Ruzek to keep his mouth shut. After finding out Charlie was involved I came to you and asked how to handle it. I always have your best interests at heart. Don't you _ever_ accuse me of not caring." My eyes are full of anger as I stare down at her, her own eyes staring back in shock.

"Let's just get to the briefing. Hank's putting me down as a CI… we're setting Charlie up. I've already laid the trap."

"And whatever Charlie has on you? That been sorted?"

"I'll work it out. I don't need your help Jay."

"Right." My tone has bite as I turn and leave Erin alone in the break room, perching on my desk ready to hear the update.

* * *

Erin POV

My fingers are tapping on my steering wheel as I'm parked and staring up at Jay's building not knowing what to do. Whether or not to act on any of the feelings swirling around inside me, I squeeze my eyes closed just wanting to cry.

My talk with Annie has me thinking how I have changed; I'm no longer the same person I was at fifteen. I keep thinking of myself in that same way, keeping me rooted to that time of my life.

I'm no longer that person, I've changed and I feel like I finally deserve love and to know what that feels like.

I throw open the car door before making my way to Jay's floor and banging on the door.

He opens the door in sweats and a shirt, an ice pack on his bruised knuckles.

"Erin, what are you doing here?" He raises an eyebrow at me, surprise on is face.

"You can't just say that to me." I growl at him frustrated.

"What?" He screws his face up confused.

" _That's why you have back up._ What you did was above that… I just… I was thanking you for everything, blown away by how you handled it all today. Even after I was a bitch to you in the break room and you just… shrugged it off." My head is shaking by the end, unsure of my own feelings.

"Are you angry I did it or that I downplayed it?" I curse as he stares down at me; I notice he's left the door open as he walks further into his apartment.

I follow him and close the door behind me.

"I don't know. I just want…"

"What?" He turns around to look at me again, his blue eyes pleading.

"You." The word falls through my lips immediately, when my mind catches up with my heart I cover my mouth shocked.

"Fuck. No. I just… I don't know." I turn and walk away from Jay's shocked face.

"Erin." Jay comes over to me, catching my arm and turning me to him.

"It was a close one today." I whisper, clinging to him desperately.

"With your past or the shooting?"

"Both… it was close Jay. What if I didn't get around the van in time, he would have shot you." Tears slip down my cheeks.

"Hey, I'm fine." His hands reach out to rest on my shoulders, his ice back forgotten.

"I'm sorry. It's just been an emotional couple of days."

"You don't have to apologise. I'm always here for you. You don't have to hold it in…" I nod my head as I wipe my tears.

"Thank you for having my back today." Jay tells sincerely, knowing how close a call it really was.

"Charlie said something when I gave him the blueprints." Jay's hands drop from my shoulders like he knows what's coming.

"He said you had this look in your eyes… I've noticed it too but I guess I just try and ignore it. Because it's easier than having to deal with my feelings about everything. After the shooting it's getting harder to push down."

"Then stop. Let's clear the air." Jay's hands are on his hips as I look up at him.

"Why did you punch him?" Jay's eyes widen, not expecting the conversation to start there.

"You should have heard what he said Erin…"

"What? That we have a past." I can't say the words, feeling sick to my stomach with the memories now that I'm older and know better.

"No, I wouldn't do that out of petty jealously. He basically insinuated you were his property… and to talk about anyone like that… he was just being vulgar and I sure as shit didn't appreciate it about you. You deserve respect."

My heart skips a beat when Jay mentions jealousy over me, hope filling my heart that perhaps the feelings are returned.

"I saw how uncomfortable you were the night you ran into him. The haunted look in your eyes when he first left word with Platt… With what he said and what I saw on your CI file I pieced it together." He's furious as he recalls it all.

"Don't assume." I fire back wishing Jay didn't have to know this about my past.

"Was I right?" Jay presses.

"Yes." I whisper, not wishing to lie to him.

"He's an animal Erin, from my math he was a hell of a lot older than you were. You were fifteen… he's lucky a punch is all he got." Jay's eyes are scary and his tone furious.

"Jay… please."

"The way he spoke about it… Erin, it was wrong. He was an adult and he took advantage of you."

"I know."

"Talk to me, I'm your partner." He encourages me, tears glossing his eyes.

"Yeah I know." I can't keep the bitterness from my tone.

"What does that mean?" He frowns at me.

"Nothing, don't worry."

"No. Tell me. What the hell do you mean by that?" His feet take a step forward as he demands an answer.

My hands find his shoulders as I bring him in for an intense kiss, not being able to keep my desires at bay any longer.

His hands are on my waist, pulling me closer as mine wrap around his neck sighing as he slips a tongue in my mouth.

We're panting when we pull apart.

"I don't want to be just partners." I admit looking up into his eyes.

"Are you sure?" His hand comes up to cup my cheek and I lean into it closing my eyes.

"Yes."

"Good. I've been waiting until you were ready." My eyes fly open shocked as Jay brings my lips back to his.

"Make love to me." I ask him pulling away and Jay's eyes widen.

"I thought I loved Charlie, but Bunny had bailed and he kept the heat on and food on the table and so I was loyal to him… I feel disgusting thinking of my time with him Jay. Every guy I've been with has been casual and meaningless… I don't want that anymore… I want to make love. I want to feel what it's like…"

Jay wipes the tears that slip down my face away.

"I want that intensity and love I hear about… I want more than just sex. I'm twenty nine and I don't know what it feels like."

"Erin… are you saying?" Jay breaths out unsure.

"I love you Jay, and I'm sick of fighting it." My heart is beating wildly in my chest after my confession, waiting for Jay's response.

"I love you too Erin."

"Really?" I ask, a smile coming to my face.

"Without a doubt. Let me prove it to you." Jay's lips come back down to mine softly, as his hands reach down to grab my thighs and picks me up, walking us towards his bedroom.

My back gently falls back on the bed and I reach down to pull my shirt off, leaving myself in my black bra.

Jay pulls his own shirt off before he removes his jeans, his eyes search mine for consent before he removes his boxers as well.

My pussy is throbbing with need already, the anticipation consuming me. Knowing that every thought about this moment is finally turning into reality.

Jay comes to hover over me on the bed, his lips dropping to mine softly.

My hands run along his back as his lips move along my jaw, before they go down my neck sucking softly as he goes.

My eyes fall shut in pleasure, my body on fire as I feel his naked skin against me.

Jay's hand finds my bra clasp before removing it, his eyes staring into mine.

He drops his mouth to my breast and my legs press together as I squirm with need.

His lips move down my stomach, his hands undoing my jeans and pulling them down until only my panties remain.

He takes these off with care, leaving me naked and panting with need below him.

His finger slips in and my hips jerk in response, he slips another finger in feeling how wet I am.

The pressure is building and I'm so close to release when he pulls away, my eyes fly down to his shocked as I see his head move down between my legs.

"Wait." My voice is husky and Jay immediately stops.

"What's wrong?" He asks concerned.

"Nothing, it's just that I haven't…" I bite my lip embarrassed.

"Has no one gone down on you before?" I shake my head, eyes avoiding Jay's.

"I've pleasured them but I've never had the favor returned."

"Well I care about you getting pleasured. Let me do this for you."

I nod slowly, chest heaving unsure of what to expect.

He pumps his fingers in a few more times before bringing his mouth down, he licks along my opening a gasp falling from my lips.

Jay reaches up and rolls my nipple with his fingers, causing the pleasure to increase and my heart rate to jump up.

He pinches the nipple before trailing his hand back down, using it to hold my hips still.

I feel his lips cup my clit between his and sucks softly, moving his head around while I call out his name.

My hands are clenched tightly around the blanket beneath me as he sucks harder on my clit sending me flying over the edge.

As I ride out my orgasm Jay holds me firmly in place while he swirls his tongue around and slipping another finger in. The pleasure running through my body intensifies as he continues going down on me.

"Fuck." I breathe out, never having come so hard in my life.

Jay slides back up my body, his lips pressing urgently against mine. I moan as he pushes his tongue into my mouth, tasting my juices.

His forehead rests against mine as my legs wrap around his waist.

"I love you." He whispers against my lips and I smile up at him, eyes shining with happiness.

"I love you too." He pushes into me and I moan as I feel his penis fill me.

Jay rocks against me, his eyes staring down into mine and I marvel at the feeling of making love, knowing I'll now crave this feeling everyday.

His thrusts are slow and deliberate and every move feels intense and full of longing and love.

My eyes close as I realize I never knew such feelings could exist, never realizing this is what I've been missing all this time. Not aware that someone could be gentle and deliver each thrust with such love, to actually care what my experience was and to make sure I felt pleasure.

I wrap my legs tighter around Jay, encouraging to him to thrust deeper as he kisses me again.

He pulls away and I open my eyes, my hands cupping his cheeks so we can keep eye contact as we both come together.

When Jay's hips finally still, our breathing is irregular and I run my fingers through his hair before resting them on his neck.

"Thank you." I whisper, bringing his lips back to mine.

"For what?"

"Showing me what it feels like to be loved."

"Don't ever thank me for that. You'll always have my love." His lips touch mine again and I promise myself I'll never let him go.

I'll spend my life chasing this feeling and keeping it alive in us.

 **A/N: I honestly don't even know where this came from. But it's fiction right? lol**

 **I promise to actually work on First Date and Jays List of Fantasies next. If you're extra nice in your reviews I will try and update BOTH tomorrow night because I likely won't be home the night after that lol**

 **Review :)**


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